Ep 119: Approaching Training with a Growth Mindset
I received a question recently that deals with a very prevalent topic in my daily training activities. While the question was a bit more specific to the trainer’s situation, the gist of the question was: How do you deal with frustration?
The number one thing that I have to tell myself during periods of frustration is to take a step back. Give yourself 60 seconds to get away from the situation and think before you react.
Taking a step back is arguably the hardest part of horsemanship. It is very difficult to view your own training program from an outside lens. But, if you can make a point to step off of your horse for 60 seconds and think, “what can I change to make this situation easier for myself and my horse,” this small change will make a huge impact on your attitude.
This wasn’t always the way I approached frustration. When my horses didn’t perform the way I wanted, I used to view it as their personal vendetta against me. Now, that mentality seems quite silly–but, at the time, I was not approaching training from the right mindset.
With horses, I’ve learned that most of the challenges that I run into, I‘ve created through a lack of patience. Most of the frustration my horses and I run into typically stems from a lack of communication on my part.
If I don’t get the response I’m looking for and they struggle to find the release point, I have to ask myself: What do I need to do to better prepare my horse for the activity at hand?
You have to learn to view frustration from a lens of compassion. Just like humans can have bad days, so can horses. You can’t expect them to be perfect all the time. A change in the weather, a change in their surroundings…anything that causes uncertainty for that animal will likely lead to anxious behavior.
Instead of getting frustrated when your horse exhibits anxious behavior, be compassionate. Take a step back, take a deep breath, and think about what you can do to make that horse’s life easier at that moment. What can you do to build their confidence? What can you do to help them feel relaxed?
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